Co written with Aaron Bayley.So why do girls who say they're
looking for a sweet, NICE GUY always end up with JERKS? You know
what the heck I'm talking about. We see it all the time, don't we?
Girls say they are looking for one thing, but end up
always dating/doing totally different,
So, do girls really want a
manner-challenged, emotionally, physically and psychologically
abusive filthy unemployed jerk? The good news is that aside from
ones with serious problems, the answer is overwhelmingly
"NO". Girls don't want jerks. They certainly won't say
they do. But do girls even really KNOW what they want from an
intellectual stand point? OF COURSE NOT!!
They know what they want emotionally.
They know how things make the feel
and those feelings cannot always be expressed in words. The bad news is that
girls don't want jerks, but they are ATTRACTED to them, hence they
usually end up with them. Females make decisions via feelings, not
logic. So they say to themselves, "logically, I should want
to be with LUIGI*, who is sweet, caring, and caters to my every
need, but for some reason I like AARON*, because he is so
UNCONTROLLABLE!
To clearly understand the
attributes that co-relate to attraction, let's compare the two
types of personalities:
Comparison Table
|
NICE GUY
(ATTRACTIVE FEATURES)
- sweet, friendly
-
caring, giving
- often romantic,
spontaneous
NICE GUY (UNATTRACTIVE
FEATURES)
- POSSIBLE low
confidence
- predictable
- needy, insecure
- submissive, annoyingly
sweet
|
JERK
(ATTRACTIVE FEATURES)
- APPEARS confident,
mysterious
- strong, unpredictable
- dominating, presents a
challenge
JERK (UNATTRACTIVE
FEATURES)
- POSSIBLY abusive
- irrational, careless
- insecure (beneath
"tough" exterior)
- socially unacceptable
|
Do you notice that all the
attractive features of the male jerk are attributes that instantly
attract females, while their unattractive features are the ones
that usually come out over the long haul?
Of course you did.
You are a smart person.
Also, notice that the attractive
features of the nice guy are ones that most females get from their
girlfriends and family; therefore they don't LOOK for those things
during the attraction process/phase. Moreover, the unattractive features
of the nice guy are instantly noticeable. It is here where the
manipulative instincts of a woman come into play, and the nice guy
becomes a spineless doormat, which women may like as a
"platonic friend", but don't have much respect for, much
less any attraction towards.
THE JAMES BOND PROTOTYPE
Aaron and I first discussed the James Bond Prototype on New Year's Day 2004
in trendy cafe in Old Montreal. The
idea is as follows: imagine you took the attractive features of a
nice guy, and the attractive features of a jerk and combined them
to create a super hybrid alpha male ( I know it has already been
done and Luigi Di Serio was created. But aside from me- imagine!)
You would have the quintessential man, a "paradoxical
paragon", if you will, a model of perfection that is not
quite what it seems. Hence, THE JAMES BOND PROTOTYPE:
HE IS: uncontrollable, yet in
control in a suave and slick way; he is living on the edge yet
classy and exciting. He is stern yet protective, ; he is intellectual
yet polite and cultured; he is mysterious yet inviting secure romantic challenges
in a
friendly direct and articulate way.
So you see, women DO want nice
guys, but they are more attracted to jerks. I actually feel
sympathy for women, because they often must sacrifice or
compromise something with a nice guy OR a jerk. To all the guys,
do yourself a favour-the next time you find yourself in a
predicament or a compromising situation with a woman, just ask
yourself:
What would James Bond do?
